In his article, Andy Hunt has hit the nail on the head by calling our attention to one of the most important stumbling blocks in everyday human communication – the tendency of all of us to feel that we are “right” and the other person is “wrong”, and that something must be done about that. Almost inevitably it is that the other person should admit their “wrongness”.
Here I give you a Choices tapping sequence to address this problem.
Start with the karate chop spot and repeat the following phrase three times out loud while continuing to tap on this spot:
Karate chop spot: Even though I know I’m right and s/he is obviously wrong, I choose to think it’s simply irrelevant and go about my business.
Now do Part 1 of the Choices Trio which concentrates on the negative in order to get it out of your system.
Inner eyebrow: S/he is absolutely wrong!
Outer eye: It’s obvious s/he’s wrong.
Under eye: This is terrible because s/he is wrong and doesn’t see it.
Under nose: It’s totally unfair, the whole thing.
Under mouth: S/he doesn’t see my point.
Collarbone: S/he’s not following the reasoning.
Under arm: We’re never going to be able to solve this!
Top of head: And this is one of those things that can’t be left unsettled.
Inner eyebrow: S/he’ll have to see my point of view.
Top of head: S/he will see my point of view – or else!
If you still feel strongly about this issue, as you well may even after having done this first round once, repeat this round two of three more times until you begin to feel some easing up of your anger and determination to win.
Now do Part 2 of the Choices Trio which consists of making positive Choices and tapping them in.
Inner eyebrow: I choose to hear a strange and unfamiliar voice in my head.
Outer eye: It says a strange thing.
Under eye: It says, “It doesn’t make a darn bit of difference who’s right!”
Under nose: It says, “Who cares who’s right!”
Under mouth: It says, “I couldn’t care less who’s right.”
Collarbone: I think we’re caught in futility here.
Under arm: I think this is really absurd.
Top of head: One of us simply has to admit it’s absurd.
Inner eyebrow: What do I care whose right and who’s wrong?
Outer eye: We’ve got to arrive at a practical solution.
Take an easy breath in and let it out slowly.
Under eye: We’re not going to get our heads chopped off if one of us is wrong.
Under nose: We’re not going to win the Nobel Prize if one of us is right.
Under mouth: What differences does it really make?
Collarbone: I choose to see the absurdity in all this.
Under arm: I choose to see this from a great distance.
Top of head: I choose to see the humor that’s actually in it.
Inner eyebrow: I choose to “get off it”
Outer eye: …and do whatever it takes to calm down.
Under eye: I choose to simply not care whose right.
Under nose: (sigh) I choose to be FREE.
You may need to repeat this Part 2 of the Choices Trio several times until it begins to “take”… it will..
Now do Part 3 of the Choices Trio where you alternate your negative statement with a positive statement on every other tapping point.
Inner eyebrow: I know I’m right and s/he is – obviously – wrong.
Outer eye: I choose to think it’s irrelevant who’s right and go about my business.
Under eye: I know I’m right and s/he is – obviously – wrong.
Under nose: I choose to think it’s irrelevant who’s right and go about my business.
Under mouth: I know I’m right and s/he is – obviously – wrong.
Collarbone: I choose to think it’s irrelevant who’s right and go about my business.
Under arm: I know I’m right and s/he is – obviously – wrong.
Top of head: I choose to think it’s irrelevant who’s right and go about my business.
Take an easy breath in and let it out slowly…
Now rate yourself again on a 0 to 10 point scale on how strongly you feel about being “right”, and then on how much anger and intensity you have about the issue.
I’d be happy if I knew that you were doing this tapping sequence regularly and that you allowed yourself to really enjoy it! You’ll want to have some fun while you’re doing it. It lends itself well to a tongue-in-cheek attitude, you can be kidding yourself in a kindly way. Have fun while you do this exercise – and that will be the most effective of all!